Sunday, September 14, 2008

Sinking Deeper into depression

i am beginning to write so glum stuff...
i dont know feeling down again, at a time like this.
i suck at yoga, i suck at gym, why did i join it in the first place.
i dont blend in anywhere, i stick out like a sore thumb.
i feel i cant chat with anybody's frens, i just feel leftout
i wanted to write about happy things that jon and i did the weekend.
but it seems i gave my chee bye face again. i wanna changed :_(
i dont wanna procastinate , i wanna gym towards a better bod, i wanna finish my degree & etc....

maybe i am trying to lump too many things together. its not i dont wanna do, like yoga when i was in cali, my back has always been like that, i feel pain when i bend down. sigh...
sometimes i feel insulted not encouraged.

i dont even know if i have friends.

i feel stupid at times, i dont wanna feel this way but to be honest, i dont really understand what people are talking. ask me to read a book and i feel lost not knowing the concept or *gist* of the story.

i honestly say this from the bottom of my heart, its a struggle for me learning at 28, i find it difficult to write , read or even understand uni homework. i made a wrong decision again & i wish i could burrow a hole and stick my head in it.

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